"WHY I MUST DO THIS"
originally published via the late Lonesome Noise blog
(post 1 of 7)
Summer Residency 2015
August 10, 2015
Ok, perhaps this is a bit ambitious for a first post, and perhaps I overestimated the ease with which I could write about this, and perhaps I’ve been staring at the blank page a bit longer than I care to admit. I think it’s necessary to start here, though.
Why the hell do I drag a cello, guitar, pedalboard, looping mic, and an amplifier to more places than I can remember, to assemble this delicate machinery (which will induce at least three hair-pulling-kill-me-now moments during the sound check), to ultimately have guaranteed problems successfully reaching the ears of the listener in its intended sonic quality amidst the clinking of glasses and general war of sounds we call a bar?
I fucking love music. I now understand what people mean when they say they are “married” to their work… I truly hope I can develop the depth of romantic love for another human being the same way that I love music.
Because sometimes when I play music, every fiber of my being vibrates and expands and brims until the immensity of existence pours from my eyes and time slows down and the breath leaving my body extends from every cell and at that moment, nothing else exists.
That space is also accessible through listening– this experience is healing and human. beings. need. it. because the world is so full of shit in so many ways, at every turn, left and right, up and down, it’s everywhere. The natural way of existence is inevitably toward entropy, and yet, human beings build amazing and delicate machines and bridges and build each other houses and cook each other dinner and paint paintings and fix bicycles and sing songs. We must actively engage in beauty to combat decay.
And this is how I’m doing it. I seek to create moments of beauty, joy, and connection with people, by writing and playing the best damn music I can make and crossing my fingers that by playing the best I can, someone might connect with it so deeply that they reach the other side and can return to their lives refreshed and renewed and energized.
But I’m probably actually going to spend most of this week talking about recording.
Up until very recently, I could only accomplish my aims by playing music live, which carries with it the aforementioned grievances. However, big changes are just around the bend! Last night, we recorded the final notes of Olive Tiger’s debut full-length album. I’m not embarrassed for it to be on record that I cried over the celebratory shots of Stranahan's. This has been a really, really long time coming for me, and yet it’s happening at exactly the right time, so many things falling into place.
Having just finished the record last night, I have a lot of thoughts to untangle. Stay tuned this week for the grand untangling, featuring my darling bandmates, violinist Jesse Newman and drummer Dane Scozzari.
Thanks y’all, and a special thanks to the Lonesome Noise team for having us.